Peas are gross.

I hate peas.

Hate. Despise. Loathe.

I wish all of the pea pods on earth would get some sort of fungus that vaporizes them and removes them from existence.

Because peas are disgusting, horrid little things that taste like stomach bile.

I've tried so hard, several times to eat peas. I try to be a grown up. I put some on my fork or in my spoon, raise them to my lips, choke back need to retch, and I try to eat them.

And I always end up nearly running towards the nearest bathroom to rid myself of the peas as quickly as I can.

Take today's lunch, for example. It was an Indian dish (mattar paneer) consisting of rice, chickpeas, and curried peas.

I figured that being covered in curry would make the peas bearable.

I sadly figured wrong.

I mixed them with the rice and nearly spit them out. I upped the curry to pea ratio leaving myself one pea in a spoonful of curry. No dice. It still tasted like Satan's toe jam.

So I ate around them. At the end of my meal, I was left with a plate full of nasty, little green balls of ewww.

So I dumped them down the sink and ground them up into a gooey oblivion.

And now I'm left with a stomach ache. I can't help but wonder if it's the 3 peas I ingested reeking havoc on my innards.